At five I was alive but I was not free. It took me 18 years to realize I was an adult until I was 23. Then, I began to grieve, and I´m so thankful for the luxury. I finally got to be a child once I got past my self denial, denying my own desires,Continue reading “Young Adult, Old child”
Tag Archives: writing
Shedding perfection
Shedding perfection feels like shedding my skin. But not “shedding”, pulling and pressing and tearing and ripping with precision and imprecision. Shedding perfection feels like losing myself, and fearing what I’ll find in return. Shedding, perfection means risking and getting messy and being wrong and having to own that and live with it. Shedding perfectionContinue reading “Shedding perfection”
Tell her
Will you tell her that I sobbed? That the tears that came wouldn’t, couldn’t stop? Will you tell her how my cheeks both sagged and creaked, Yet smiled and gleamed, from painful and grateful aspects of my reality? 9 April 2023
Heart contrast
My heart hurts & yearns together It feels burdensome & tight. It wants others to give it what it has to give itself. Winter 2023
Why would I?
Why would I outrun the rain? The same rain that I claim to love. Why would I hide from the wind? The same wind, whispering wanderlust in my ear. Why would I shy from crying? Tap my eyes like the maple to bring their syrup. I do not desire a life of convenience, though IContinue reading “Why would I?”
The letter I wish I´d received; the message never sent
Dear Little Leah, You are curious & inquisitive, & though there are people out there who might try to squelch that, we are not those people (& want you to ignore all of them). We love that you care about others & want you still to put yourself first. You can be kind, supportive &Continue reading “The letter I wish I´d received; the message never sent”
He walked me home
He walked me home last night On the air was old spice, strong, briefly, twice. He made it clear that he´d seen me there, almost to the door, but from there he´d go no more. When, an hour before, I´d sat at where I believed he´d breathed his last. Looking to the ground; the snow,Continue reading “He walked me home”
Water on water, thought on thought
The rapidity of my thoughts get blocked by boulders, deflecting those words, leaving them spinning or continuing downstream out of my conscious. Some stay trapped in the jetty while others are whisked away, water on water on water. LT. 20 May 2021
Carry me
The chilling wind on my face, the same that´s making those little pine trees dance. The same giving lift to birds in flight, cools my face like water, cupped and splashed. It cuts both through and around my parameters, edges, curves. Eroding flesh and exposing bone, and marrow. Maybe tomorrow it will carry me likeContinue reading “Carry me”
Bitter before
I need to feel bitter before I feel better because by beating and bearing down instead of bearing to witness I do myself the disservice of dishonesty, cause honestly, I never got to feel my bitter. It was suppressed for the simple sake of imagining that what was on other people´s plates were greater portionsContinue reading “Bitter before”
Leah.like.Leia 